The poem Levegőt! [A Breath of Air!] was published in Attila József’s book of poems titled Nagyon fáj [It Hurts so Much] in early 1936. Although Attila József was already an established poet, it was this volume that brought him real recognition—his new poems were hailed by critics as the beginning of a new phase. For example, one critic wrote: “Few of our new writers have brought so much new value. And yet... I do feel with the acclaimed and popular Attila József, even more than in the case of twenty-year old poets, that I am reading the poems of a poet who, despite his fine past, is still at the beginning of his career, who can bring great surprises, and who, like the age he so honestly and powerfully lives, has not yet found his final balance.” Unfortunately, the critic was not right: the world became more and more out of equilibrium in the years following the publication of the volume, and Attila József also failed to find his spiritual balance. In his last years, his illness became more and more prevalent upon him, and he spent longer periods in a sanatorium. However, he also worked during this period: it was at this time that he wrote his most mature poems, including love poems, or Ars Poetica. But, in his last period, as Miklós Szabolcsi puts it, “In addition to his own hell, Attila József also emerged in the inferno of the age.” Attila József spent his whole life searching for love and the feeling of belonging somewhere with an almost childish stubbornness. When he eventually lost his grip on the world, he felt that life was no longer worth living: ‘What I hold no longer holds me’ (Könnyű emlékek… [Ligh Memories...], 1937). On December 3, 1937, he threw himself in front of a freight train near Balatonszárszó. His last completed, untitled poem, the untitled [Ime hát megleltem hazámat…] [Behold, I found my land…] bears witness to this desperate feeling, but as Szabolcsi put it, “The tragedy of individual existence is not elevated above the tragedy of the existence of others; …even if individual destiny ends in tragedy, it cannot end the same way for humanity.”

(Behold, I have found my land...)

Behold, I have found my land, the country
Where my name's cut without a fault
By him who is to bury me,
If he was bred to dig my vault.

Earth gapes: I drop into the tin,
Since the iron halfpenny,
Which at a time of war came in,
Has outlived its utility.

Nor is the iron ring legal tender.
New world, land, rights: I read each letter.
Our law is war's, the thriftless spender,
And gold coins keep their value better.

Long I had lived with my own heart;
Then others came with many a fuss.
They said: "You kept yourself apart.
We wish you could have been with us."

So did I live in vanity.
I now draw my conclusion thus.
They did but make a fool of me,
And even my death is fatuous.

I have tried all my life to keep
My footing in a whirlwind fast.
The thought is ludicrously cheap
That others' harm matched mine at last.

The spring is good and summer, too,
But autumn better and winter best
For him who finds his last hopes through
Family hearths he knew as guest.

November 24, 1937

Translated by Vernon Watkins